By Heather C.
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| Photo via simplysenia.com. |
Is there a standard for when it’s acceptable to miss school?
Is there an age or an excuse that makes it okay? I was faced with this dilemma
this week with my preschool-aged daughter.
Odds were against us on Tuesday morning, a freezing cold day. One of my
13-month-old daughters was on day three of a severe double ear infection. It was
her first day with no temp, but she was up from 2 a.m. till close to 5 a.m.
screaming in pain, her screams waking up her sisters, her dad, and, of course,
me. When the alarm went off at 6:30, getting out of bed was the last thing on
my mind. Then I checked the weather and it was a ridiculous 9 degrees outside.
Would you have kept your preschooler
home? What if your child was a second grader? Would you call in sick to work?
What and when is this practice okay? For me, I kept my preschooler home. I felt guilty, but
I kept her home. I sent a text to her teacher, who was very understanding, and we
stayed snuggled in. (Luck would have it, a mini unexpected blizzard started
about 15 minutes before preschool pickup, so I was VERY glad I didn’t have to go
out in that on top of the cold.)
For smaller children, skipping
a day of preschool seems to be okay. Many moms say, “It’s
just preschool” or, “You only live once.” That seems fair. I mean, we
are talking about a 3-year-old here. It’s hard to make too many lifelong
plans at 3. But does this set your child up for a future of skipping?
Parents need to get involved and show their children that
school is interesting. Older children tend to fake illnesses to get out of
school. Boredom is the number one cause for students to skip class. We often focus on the “required” part and compare going to school to adults having to go to work, but we should emphasize the
interesting learning material, opportunities for fun, and the social aspect. If kids
don’t feel like school is valuable, the
trend for skipping and dropping out will become dangerous, with 75% of students
not finishing college, according to Education.com
Even more worrisome, a
CNN blog cites a study claiming students who miss more than 10 days of
school are nearly 20 percent less likely to graduate from high school.
Are you still sure about that innocent day off? On top of
all the lifelong consequences, there are the simple moral issues you’ll be
faced with. Do you lie to the teacher? Do you pretend your child was ill and
play catch up later? Or do you stick with the truth, plan ahead, and pick up any
missed work so your child does not get behind? Once you figure out the moral
issues, don’t forget there are actual legal issues, too. Do you know the truancy
laws in your state? An honest or innocent day of memorable fun for the
family could result in court hearings, fines, or even jail time.
So what do you think?
Are you still okay with “just missing preschool?” Weigh in on the topic and
leave us a comment.
You can contact Heather by e-mailing her at heatherc@mumblingmommy.com.
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5 comments:
I say pick your days sparingly but if there is a time that makes sense to 'skip' be honest about it. With the custody situation of our stepson, he has missed a day of pre-k or kindergarten here and there simply because it was best for all, or he hadn't spent enough time with his mom so he spent the day with her. We always tell his teachers upfront what is going on and they have always been sensitive to our situation, especially since he completes all his work on time, etc. I say go with your gut but keep communication open!
I say pick your days sparingly but if there is a time that makes sense to 'skip' be honest about it. With the custody situation of our stepson, he has missed a day of pre-k or kindergarten here and there simply because it was best for all, or he hadn't spent enough time with his mom so he spent the day with her. We always tell his teachers upfront what is going on and they have always been sensitive to our situation, especially since he completes all his work on time, etc. I say go with your gut but keep communication open!
I almost kept my kindergartener home from school Tuesday because it was 0 degrees with a windchill of -12. When it came down to it, I couldn't justify it. She has perfect attendance so far, and I feel like it sets them up to believe it's ok to skip, and they won't be able to just skip work when they are older. I'm trying to raise my kids to be responsible adults, and I think this is part of it. It may be minor now, but my kids have amazing memories (except when they don't want to remember it) and they'd bring it up later. My one exception would be senior skip day.
Funny this should come up today... we've had a stomach bug going around the house this week keeping us from doing things. This morning the kids were fine but mom wasn't. It was pretty tempting to let all of us sleep in a little when the alarm went off and get the eldest kid to school late... but I just couldn't. I think there had better be a super good reason to skip school, if you do it once it gets easier next time and then next time. .. and I agree it gives kids a bad message.
Funny this should come up today... we've had a stomach bug going around the house this week keeping us from doing things. This morning the kids were fine but mom wasn't. It was pretty tempting to let all of us sleep in a little when the alarm went off and get the eldest kid to school late... but I just couldn't. I think there had better be a super good reason to skip school, if you do it once it gets easier next time and then next time. .. and I agree it gives kids a bad message.
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