Moms Need to Take Care of Themselves, Too

By Lori

Lori, at right, enjoying time with friends 
at a baby shower.

Moms do it all. We drive our kids to lessons, we buy them nice clothes, we make sure they have time with their friends, and we take them to do the things they love. We cook meals they like and make sure they eat their veggies. We miss the occasional checkup for ourselves, but we never skip the children’s appointments. So why do so many moms put themselves on the back burner?

Many moms feel that between cooking, cleaning, and work obligations, there is no spare time to read a book or go to the salon. And perhaps there is no spare time, per say, but we need to make time. Moms must take time to be themselves and not feel guilt-ridden about doing so.

Moms need time with friends, time to enjoy our hobbies, and time to make sure our health is in check. Time alone helps us relax and get our sanity back, and come back and resume our roles as mommies with a new and invigorated vengeance. Personally, I know that after I have some time to enjoy being me, I am much more patient with my 2-year-old and feel less frustrated by ornery behavior. Each day, set aside just a few minutes to do something that relaxes you or makes you happy. Make sure you choose something that makes you feel like … you. 

Always remember that you are a valued member of your family. You deserve your own attention as much as everyone else. Regularly take part in activities that make you feel happy, whether it is running, talking with a friend, taking photographs, or reading a book.  Socialize with your friends. I have a group of girls I have known for years (two of them have been dear friends since middle school) and about once each month, we get together for a few hours and eat and talk. It is wonderful, and something the four of us all look forward to doing!

When my daughter was born in May, I went from working outside of the home to working a few hours each week from home with two young children. After a short time, I realized that while my life felt almost fulfilled. I was rocking out the stay-at-home mom job, making money on the side, cooking (kind of!), and keeping the house as tidy as possible, but there was one little thing missing: taking care of me. 

Of course, my husband supports me when I need to take time for myself. He will tell me to go do what I need and want to do, and usually just walking out of the room for a few minutes clears my head and calms me down. Taking a few minutes to get away is not selfish; it is an essential part of parenting in a healthy way. Moms need to care for themselves with the same vigor they put into making sure housework is done, diapers are changed, and dinner is on the table. Every mom should treat herself as an equal part of the family. This will allow her to best take care of everyone else. 

You can contact Lori by e-mailing her at Lori@mumblingmommy.com.

While you're here, you may enjoy these other posts:  

Looking for Mommy Friends

Emotional Considerations for Stay-At-Home Parents

Dealing with Mom Guilt